Day 3
I haven got much to say today..
the heart grows faint as your stubbornness thrive.
If you haven told me what you're supposed to, do so quickly cos' as the days goes by I doubt this heart will be able to hold up any longer.
Always have Love,
Melissa.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
So much to say..Day 2 of 10
Day 2
Last night was one of the best cell ever, despite all that's within me that's battling against leading Praise and worship cos' I really didn't feel like I was in the right position to. After leading worship I heard the exact same words you told me God told you "No mountain too high to conquer if you put your heart into it."
God came through for our cell after the Word, His presence hit us so hard we all started crying out for more of Him, with tears and sound of sobbing I knew it was a time of refreshing, a long needed one.
Came home wanting more for that same encounter I knelled down on both knees telling God "If my relationship with YOU is strong then only can my relationship with Alex be strong, I'm utterly sorry if I've put anything in life before YOU, tonight I wanna love You with all that I am. God we need Your peace, we need Your strength, Your comfort to go through these days apart. If I'm hurting like that, alex is hurting a 100times more, if I'm crying like this, Alex is crying a 100times more..come and be our peace in a time as such."
After service this evening, I thought to myself good or bad we should just talk things out once more because the one we had on thurs was a really mad one. kinda had a feeling you would say No. And true enough you did.
You have your reasons and I don't wanna question, you said you had to do some soul searching, in front of a river? why choose to stay in front of a river when the problem doesn't settle miraculously instead you could have trusted me and got to a real living being that could resolves issues together with you..
Anyhows, it probably shows we're not quite ready I guess..more time apart as propose should be better than I supposed?
We'll just see how things go then.
Oh by the way, my heart has this constant ache. A literally ache like a pain kinda ache.
A Better day tomorrow I hope.
Always have love,
Melissa
Last night was one of the best cell ever, despite all that's within me that's battling against leading Praise and worship cos' I really didn't feel like I was in the right position to. After leading worship I heard the exact same words you told me God told you "No mountain too high to conquer if you put your heart into it."
God came through for our cell after the Word, His presence hit us so hard we all started crying out for more of Him, with tears and sound of sobbing I knew it was a time of refreshing, a long needed one.
Came home wanting more for that same encounter I knelled down on both knees telling God "If my relationship with YOU is strong then only can my relationship with Alex be strong, I'm utterly sorry if I've put anything in life before YOU, tonight I wanna love You with all that I am. God we need Your peace, we need Your strength, Your comfort to go through these days apart. If I'm hurting like that, alex is hurting a 100times more, if I'm crying like this, Alex is crying a 100times more..come and be our peace in a time as such."
Today at 2:45am ·
After service this evening, I thought to myself good or bad we should just talk things out once more because the one we had on thurs was a really mad one. kinda had a feeling you would say No. And true enough you did.
You have your reasons and I don't wanna question, you said you had to do some soul searching, in front of a river? why choose to stay in front of a river when the problem doesn't settle miraculously instead you could have trusted me and got to a real living being that could resolves issues together with you..
Anyhows, it probably shows we're not quite ready I guess..more time apart as propose should be better than I supposed?
We'll just see how things go then.
Oh by the way, my heart has this constant ache. A literally ache like a pain kinda ache.
A Better day tomorrow I hope.
Always have love,
Melissa
Friday, March 12, 2010
So Much to Say..Day 1 of 10
Just though of coming back to this page, this place where I pen down my loveliest time together with him and take a slow walk down memory lane again to do a refreshing of the mind.
Guess it really did serve as a reminder of how far we've come, how much accomplishments we've made as a couple, the initial struggle of winning my dad over to approve us, the mistakes we made, the correction we made, the learning to collaborate with each other the love that we shared.
Endless work that needs to be done in a thing called LOVE.
I'm thinking no one ever comes here to read anymore, not even you..I just need an outlet to "let out my cries".
Yes setbacks are inevitable in relationships, arguments and fights are necessary to build us up to help us learn how to work around our differences. However last night was a mad one i guess...
Conclusion: 10days of putting into serious though about this whole thing, 10 days of learning to be independent, 10days of finding that which I left behind in a hurry, 10days to tell myself we're gonna work this, and if we do survive this 10days? We'll fight harder to stay together to work together, to COLLABORATE again, lesser nonsense from you and I.
Sometimes a short rest will do us good, it empowers us to run further, it teaches us the importance of cherishing what we have. - I do hope this does justice for us.
So instead of crying and feeling all outta the world, lets work hard and change and correct the bad habits that's putting a strain to this relationship.
Day 1
Has been really tough, when I told you to walk away I felt a burden lifted from me, not because you were my burden but because I didn't want you to see me crying else you'll never go home, when u left, part of me wished that you'll be waiting for me at the lift lobby, yet I hope you won't. I walked and walked around my estate, recalling the talked that we just had, thinking that I shouldn't have said some words, tearing and when it's dried I went back home. Sat in the showers and broke down again cos I thought everything was so silly, if only I wasn't so stubborn..
Strummed the guitar so hard, looked at my cock-board full of pictures of Us and choked up with tears of frustrations, cried myself to sleep.
Am at work now and i'm choked with tears every now and then and it feels really awful. Really really awful knowing I have to do stuffs alone at least for this 10days.
I'm the one that asked for this, but is this what I wanted?
Perhaps this 10 days is good for us.
Always have Love,
Melissa
Guess it really did serve as a reminder of how far we've come, how much accomplishments we've made as a couple, the initial struggle of winning my dad over to approve us, the mistakes we made, the correction we made, the learning to collaborate with each other the love that we shared.
Endless work that needs to be done in a thing called LOVE.
I'm thinking no one ever comes here to read anymore, not even you..I just need an outlet to "let out my cries".
Yes setbacks are inevitable in relationships, arguments and fights are necessary to build us up to help us learn how to work around our differences. However last night was a mad one i guess...
Conclusion: 10days of putting into serious though about this whole thing, 10 days of learning to be independent, 10days of finding that which I left behind in a hurry, 10days to tell myself we're gonna work this, and if we do survive this 10days? We'll fight harder to stay together to work together, to COLLABORATE again, lesser nonsense from you and I.
Sometimes a short rest will do us good, it empowers us to run further, it teaches us the importance of cherishing what we have. - I do hope this does justice for us.
So instead of crying and feeling all outta the world, lets work hard and change and correct the bad habits that's putting a strain to this relationship.
Day 1
Has been really tough, when I told you to walk away I felt a burden lifted from me, not because you were my burden but because I didn't want you to see me crying else you'll never go home, when u left, part of me wished that you'll be waiting for me at the lift lobby, yet I hope you won't. I walked and walked around my estate, recalling the talked that we just had, thinking that I shouldn't have said some words, tearing and when it's dried I went back home. Sat in the showers and broke down again cos I thought everything was so silly, if only I wasn't so stubborn..
Strummed the guitar so hard, looked at my cock-board full of pictures of Us and choked up with tears of frustrations, cried myself to sleep.
Am at work now and i'm choked with tears every now and then and it feels really awful. Really really awful knowing I have to do stuffs alone at least for this 10days.
I'm the one that asked for this, but is this what I wanted?
Perhaps this 10 days is good for us.
Always have Love,
Melissa
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Melissa Goh